When Your Child is “Too Different”, Even By Autism Standards

When Cameron was diagnosed, almost 2.5 years ago, we asked if it was Aspergers or something else and they just said “nope, it’s just Autism… he’s just on the spectrum”. They gave us the diagnosis in writing with numbers and information that made very little sense and were basically told that he is “moderate to severe”.

Later on we came to realize that, unlike most Autistics that don’t like to socialize, Cameron very much needed to socialize. In fact, he won’t even play his video games unless he has someone to play with him. He loves to have friends come over to play with him and he is always eager to share secrets and information with anyone who’ll listen. He’s what I call the anti-Autism boy. He only does things on his own when he’s overwhelmed and needs a break.

Now we come to therapy sessions where we’re told that he’s the “most inconsistent” child they’ve met… that he doesn’t like the things that every single other child they’ve dealt with does like, that he likes some things sometimes and not other times… they just don’t have any idea how to help him.

For the most part, I can’t complain too much. Cameron is a very well behaved boy, he is very smart and he has even been learning quite well how to reel back his emotions to get them under control.  However he does still have Autism. He does still need help.

It’s just frustrating not having answers… no ‘real’ diagnosis, no concrete solutions for therapy, no guarantees.

It’s funny though, if he didn’t have Autism, I think the last thing I’d want for him is to be normal, to fit the mold. I want my boys to stand out and be different. So maybe I just need to keep that perspective despite the Autism. Maybe it’s for a reason and maybe it has it’s purpose. I don’t know the future but maybe being so difficult to label is going to prove to be a good thing.

I don’t have answers but I do have hope.

About Stuart Duncan

My name is Stuart Duncan, creator of http://www.stuartduncan.name. My oldest son (Cameron) has Autism while my younger son (Tyler) does not. I am a work from home web developer with a background in radio. I do my very best to stay educated and do what ever is necessary to ensure my children have the tools they need to thrive. I share my stories and experiences in an effort to further grow and strengthen the online Autism community and to promote Autism Understanding and Acceptance.

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One Response to When Your Child is “Too Different”, Even By Autism Standards

  1. Jane July 15, 2010 at 10:50 pm #

    The thing that strikes me is – my 6 boys don’t fit the mold precisely, either. And they are so vastly different from each other its a little tough to tell they are related! What has proved, for us, to be the most important through the years is that we are addressing needs – not diagnoses. If Cameron had no diagnosis, the needs that he had would be addressed as they arose. The diagnosis changes none of that. It just means that you have a word for his needs.

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