Autism from a Father's Point of View

I totally agree. I don’t care how someone refers to his disorder as long as they treat my son with the dignity and respect he deserves.

I agree as well. When I first started researching autism, I was annoyed at the people who had such a strong insistence on how the “autistic person with autism” should be referred to. It doesn’t bother me if anyone calls my children autistic. It’s just a name and if I was that worried about labels I might not have had them diagnosed in the first place. I do wonder if the PC parents talk about their “children with autism” in their presence, as though they weren’t even there. To me, that’s more dehumanizing than the usage of the word “autistic.”

I find a lot of autistic people go to the other extreme of disliking ‘person with autism’ or ‘person with Aspergers’, because it suggests the autism is an accessory they wear rather than an intrinsic sense of their being.

I have Aspergers, and I am not bothered either way. I tend to say ‘I have Aspergers’ or ‘I am on the autistic spectrum’ because there is not an official adjective for having Aspergers. For me the most important thing is relevance and context. I generally don’t go round introducing myself as a person with Aspergers – I introduce myself by my name, as anyone else would, because I am a person, same as everyone else! I might mention the Aspergers later, if I get to know someone well, or if it’s relevant.

I thought that the Aspergers community has more-or-less adopted “Aspie” as an unofficial adjective. That’s the one I use, anyway.
(of course, some militantly insist on “Aspergian”…but that’s a whole ‘nother discussion!)

Totally agree with you, Stuart.

I’m all for letting people using whichever they feel is right, and there are equally valid reasons for using either “autistic” or “person with autism”. The only wrong way is to insist that OTHERS use one form or the other.

And you’re right, there are far more important things to be concerned with than nomenclature!

Signed,
A Person With Femaleness, Gayness, Brunetteness, and Aspie-Ness.

Thanks for the support on this everyone. My first thought was to not write this so as to not offend anyone.
Then I got to thinking about how easily offended these people must be in the first place that this is even an issue.

Anyway, I’m glad to hear that others (especially PERSONS with Autism/Aspergers) agree with me.

Now, let’s get back to focusing on more important stuff, shall we?

Yes, a lot do, but others dislike it because it’s ‘cutesy’ or other reasons. I would prefer there to be an official term, so that I could use it without confusing people who are not part of the Aspergers community. For communication purposes, really, and to be taken seriously.

I agree and disagree with you. I don’t think a lot of time should be spent on the every day person using language that “puts the child first”. However, I am an academic and work to train the very people who will work directly with your children; Many of them, in my opinion, are but children themselves. These future teachers and psychologists don’t have children, let alone any real hands on experience with children with disabilities. While research and funding need to stay focused on the real issues such as cause, prevention, intervention and treatment, I think it is very important, and my duty, to make sure our future practitioners put the child first.
Nothing is worse than sitting in a review meeting and instead the educators using the child’s name, like Joey and Sue, I hear, “the downs girl acted up again” or “the autistic hit the teacher and had to go to the take down room”. This is where the whole “put the child first” issue evolved. Saying the child is autistic is not the issue, a person referring to your son as “the autistic” repeatedly in conversation in lieu of ever using his name, is completely unacceptable. They are people, not just conditions. I think you’d want me to call your son Connor in conversations instead of the autistic boy in my class.
Caregivers and professionals are extremely guilty of making the label the person. Of course, if you have 20 children with autism in a classroom, it becomes less of an issue as other identifiers have to be used. But you will find in schools where the average student is of typical development, many untrained people will refer to the child according to their diagnosis, and that’s just sad. My child may have Down’s syndrome or Cerebral Palsy, but his name is Joe, not the kid with downs. Everyone has a name and deserves respect.
So if we are in practice of not using the adjectives autistic or downs, but forced to say child with autism, you will find it becomes too wordy, and you start just using the child’s actual name. It’s easy to say, “The autistic kid isn’t integrating well”. It’s annoying to say, “The child with autism isn’t integrating well”. You should say, “Joe isn’t integrating well”, since, if you know Joe, you already know he has autism. Eureka!

Spot on!

Most of the people I know who have autism don’t spend any time worrying about this issue. Out of curiosity, if it’s OK for me to refer to my children as my “autisic twins”, then twenty years ago…when my wife was undergoing chemotherapy…would have it been OK for me to refer to her as my “cancerous wife”?

this stuff make me sn my friends nuts i have autism and me an my friends dont sit around thinking about are lable .i wish they would not refer to us as a puzzle we are people an i guss i would say if i tell someone i have autism i say my name then my disbilty

Stuart wow finally yes yes agreed they are not autistic they are our loved ones diagnosed with autism. I correct so many people on this as they are people first and a diagnosis secondary . Being autistic in my mind is saying that is who they are and it is not. Autism does not define them. They are people with the diagnosis not a diagnosis and then the person. So do we say hey theres Heart Problem Joe NO we say hey theres Joe who has heart problems. Sorry I do not like the saying autistic I even correct doctors on it
Mom of twins and 1 with autism

I agree with you 100%. My daughter has autism and I have refered to her as having autism, being autisitic etc

Tina, there is nothing wrong with these people. Of course everyone is a person first, but there is no blank white slate underneath everyone that is some ‘perfectness’. A person is autistic to the bone, just as a black person is. I’m an italian, not a person with italian heritage. A down syndrome person does not HAVE down syndrome, it’s who they are. It is in their DNA. People like you who correct others on this obviously have a problem with this ‘ disorder’ to be so up tight about it.

[...] Is It “Autistic Person” or “Person with Autism”? by Stuart Duncan BookmarkDiggRecommendShare with StumblersTumblr itSubscribePrintEmail This entry was posted in OT, Psych, SLP and tagged 2 December 2011, Article, Autism, Newsletter. Bookmark the permalink. ← Baby With Down Syndrome Takes the Modeling World By Storm [...]